Getting through

It's been a crazy few weeks, or seemingly months as I feel like we've been running and going since Christmas . . . Alisha died January 14th. I'm so grateful that Dennis and I took the day and drove up to see her. She took a real turn for the worse and was moved into a beautiful hospice facility so that they could better manage her pain. But she was still coherent and Dennis was able to talk to her . . . I guess that helps a little. Still, it is all just incredibly wrong that she was so young with so many good things starting in her life.

It was the first time for the boys to go to a funeral and visitation. So hard because death is one of those things that you just want to shelter them from forever. Dominick has asked lots of questions and I'm sure lots more are to come. We've tried to answer simply and honestly but it's still hard. I think Xander also knows that something happened and he's been a bit anxious when he wakes up and I'm not there or one morning Dennis was in the shower and he freaked out a bit when I said we couldn't go down and peek at him. He went into this long explanation of how dad was asleep and wouldn't wake up . . .

But mostly we're doing ok. Dominick is now 6 and so he has taken to liking pizza. Alisha was the same way, she decided she would learn to tie her shoes when she was 5 and not a moment before. On her 5th birthday she brought down her shoes and said, now teach me. She was a difficult one! We've said from the beginning that Domincik takes after her and not so much easy going Dennis --perhaps he takes after me, I've heard some stories from my early childhood--sorry mom.

Dragon Party

Dominick is 6--he's now on two hands. We had a great party on Sunday. Dragon themed. It was a lot of fun. Amazing how much louder and more rambunctious the kids were compared to last year. On Monday Xander and I went with Dominick to school and stayed for the morning and lunch. I'm glad I got to share in his works and be there for the birthday celebration. He walked around the earth 6 times and each time around we'd talk about what he did as a baby, one year old etc. Mostly I shared where we lived--since that has changed a lot over his little life! He also got to be the line leader, a job he takes quite seriously--so cute to watch. I was really impressed with what a little leader he is in the classroom. It's really built into the montessori system. I sometimes wish more of the school Dominick came home, but I guess there is only so much self-control and most of it gets used up at school.

Xander has been doing his 5:30 am wake up thing . . . so he's just been a bit all over the place with his behavior. I think it's partially a lack of sleep and also just part of being 2.5. I remember 2.5 to 3.5 being a bit of a challenge for us with Dominick. Xander's a different creature but some of the clingyness and neediness seems familar.